My journey to this event was both straight forward like I stated above and just as bumpy. Between each step, I had many moments of anguish and worries that I wouldn’t get this done at all. After all, I have many uncompleted manuscripts. But I finished it. This might be my second fastest publication. If I was a lesser person, I might have given up when I got my feedback on the first beta read. But I fixed it rather than throw it away.
How was my mind during this time?
Well, I arrived just on lockdown, and that might have been both a blessing and a curse. I had no distractions, but I found them. I had nobody to talk to, but I might have shied away from them under the guise of writing. I had no job and yet couldn’t make writing my job. I was harder on myself than I should have been. However, I still managed to complete it 🙂
So what happens next?
Well, I have a bunch of other stories I came up with around the same time as The Dragon’s Mate, so I might work on those 🙂
Had a notice that said it is my seventh anniversary on this blog. I can’t believe it. I set this up during a uni class back in Melbourne and it’s been going strong for all that time!
Thinking back on what’s happened since then, I went and developed a bunch of feels. I’ve self-published seven stories ranging from the short ones to a novel. I failed my goal of reaching 10 stories by 30 and I might not reach it this year. I have also been living overseas for five years now. Prior to finishing high school, I had never thought that this would be where my life would end up.
I wonder what the next seven years will be like . . .
I’m giving up on the whole ten-day blog posts now that I have petered out. I seem to have lost motivation when I’m at home. But when I go to the library and battle it out with others trying to find a seat, I get work done. I can focus for three-four hours because I can’t seem to connect to the net 🙂 I have also come up with a short story idea and I think I might be able to write it out in a few more days 🙂
I haven’t done anything related to writing or editing at all. However, I do not feel bummed out. I think that is an improvement. In the last few days, I have however thought up a third story during this pandemic. It’s a portal fantasy and I have only the bare bones of what I want to happen. But I’m going to have a fun adventure with it.
The last ten days have been unproductive. I didn’t edit or write anything. I have been looking at writing a new supernatural thriller though. I’ve got some story planned, but I don’t know how it ends. I’m not sure how long it’ll be either.
However, at the same time a YouTuber – Derek Murphy, I follow came out with this long video about novel writing basics. At the end of the video, there is a small exercise where who fill in the blanks about what your story is about. It actually helped me a bit with the story I’m working on. I have added some more things to it and it’s starting to become something more.
I’ve been in the Netherlands for six-ish weeks now. I literary arrived the day before everything shut down, so it should have been a paradise for me. I was already going to have some time off work so I had been psyching myself up to it.
And then I get here and my ability to perform fails.
I’ve made some progress editing the beginning of a novel (which I gave up on). I also started a novella that’ll I have done by the end of this week. I’ve been keeping track of what I’m doing and I feel terrible about all the days where I did nothing. All that lost potential.Why can’t I make writing and editing a 9 to 5? It’s almost like I have burnout again, but I’m not sure if I do. It doesn’t help that I’m having a lot of negative thoughts that have no relation to my life at present. They are taking up a lot of time in me. Maybe it’s because I can’t socialise in person anymore.
It’s not a good day unless I’ve written more than 1k and I hardly ever do that. It’s not a good day when I spend hours playing computer games, even if I do manage to write. That’s still time spent elsewhere. From memory, I used to be so efficient at writing. But now my body and brain says no 😦
So where do I go from here?
I’m slowly getting things done, but not to my liking. Do I just keep chipping away at it? Maybe I have to as I can’t seem to do anything else. Maybe having a day job was something that improved my writing. It gave me some eustress about my finite time and made me manage what I had. Now I have all the time in the world I have no immediate rush to do anything 😦
These last 10 days, I’ll tell you what. I’ve been all over the place with how I feel about my writing and meeting my goals. I created the ‘write 500 words a day’ goal for myself. I only failed that three times. Then I became stuck in a certain section, but that was because I didn’t know where I was going. But today, while doing laundry, I came up with the ending. I’ll have finished the first draft by tomorrow. I’ve written 2700 words in four hours today. I’ve got a scene or two left and I’ve already written an epilogue.
I didn’t expect it to end so soon and I think it’ll end up being less than 25k. And after finishing this story, I’ll let it sit for a week before editing it 🙂 Depending on how much I’ve improved, I’ll be able to get this edited sooner than I thought.
I went and did that Myers-Briggs personality test. I got INFJ, the Advocate. Apparently, I’m a little bit rare and special. When I read through the profile, I saw a bit that resonated with me and a little that didn’t. I wonder if these tests take in a person’s life experiences because I never really gravitated towards charity work like the profile said. I have a lot of distrust for places that claim they are a charity. I also fit into the turbulent side more than the assertive side. My husband, on the other hand, is an ENTJ. And I feel like he is my complete opposite, but we complement each other very well.
I look at my blog posts about the first 40 days of my creative endeavours and I’m like, is that all? I’m not nearly as productive as I would like and yet I felt like I had accomplished quite a bit. It’s strange how I see things.
I always want to have more done than I have completed and I somewhat blame my cross-stitch kits. Those little bastards call to me too much. I need to complete them like I’m trying to fill a fix.
I hope by the end of the next 40 days; we’ve come out of quarantine and that I’ve at least finished The Dragon’s Mate. I want to publish it by June/July. But that is not a set date. I also want to finish one of the three cross stitches I’m doing as well 🙂