I’m due to leave Edinburgh in December, and I’m using this as an excuse to extreme declutter. I’m trying to get rid of as much as I can so that it is easier to move. But there are a few things that still have their hooks in me. A few beautiful nicknacks that I know that I might not be able to find again. Jewellery that despite never wearing, I can’t let go and a few items of clothing that I might use in the future (if I lost weight).
So far, I’ve ditched:
- Notebooks that have no notes in them.
- Books I’ve never or will never read again.
- Clothes that won’t be worn.
- Shoes that hurt my feet.
- Accessories that do not accessorize.
All up it’s only been a few bags and a few boxes as I didn’t have much to begin with. I’m now in the later phase where it’s just those items left that have sentimental ties or have a hold over me that I can’t get rid off. I have this fantasy of myself just moving with only one suitcase. Though that won’t happen because we have cats and need to move them too.
I turned 29 yesterday. I’ve never felt so old and I’m starting to understand what it means to age. I’m going to be 40 in eleven years. For a while now I feel like I’ve been ‘stuck’ in a younger mental phase. Like for my early twenties, I felt the same as I did at 16, then I kind of went through a little bit of a level up, but it was not that distinctive. But since last year I really think that I’ve matured or levelled up. I don’t know if going through burnout helped mature me or something, but that event is part of my psyche now.
A lot has happened in the past 12 months. My husband and I changed our visas and returned to the UK. It was around that time I was hit with burnout and well pretty much did not write for a solid eight months. I’ve been on holidays to Lisbon, Isreal and Jerusalem. Got two kitties cats. Somehow managed to push out a sci-fi novella (despite burnout) and read more books than I have had previously.
I have a feeling that it’ll be a full year before I get over my burnout. I’m thinking I’ll start writing/editing again in May. I remember having developed such ill feelings towards my stories. I thought of throwing away my USB’s and leaving my writing career behind never to return. But I resisted that temptation and kept them safe.
I didn’t have any of the physical effects of burnout, just most of the emotional. Irritability, disinterest and low mood. Currently, those effects have lessened quite a bit and since I’ve gone back to the gym I’m seeing improvements. But I’ve developed a feeling of inadequacy in regards to my writing. Hopefully, that will go away as soon as my mood improves.
I’m hoping that once my burnout goes away I’ll be able to return to my writing and zoom through all the stories I want to finish 🙂
I read the book ‘Save the Cat! Writes a Novel’ the other day. So naturally, I’m going to divorce my husband and take this thing as my new beloved. I mean like god damn this is a majestic book that spoonfeeds you how to structure your novel. I cannot recommend this book enough. How has it never existed until now?
I’ve got this novel from last year that might be my best one yet, but due to burnout I just stopped writing. I even know what happens next, but I don’t touch it. However, when reading this glorious packet of helpfulness I constantly kept thinking of that story and how I’m on the right track with it.
I got my passport back and I have a uk visa for the next five years 🙂 I go back in four days time 🙂
I’m not sure what the rest of the year is going to bring, but I’m planning on being more productive with my writing and I want to put out four stories by the end of the year 🙂 I’m on my way there so here’s hoping I’ll reach my goal 🙂