I follow my own path (and I wonder if that’s good enough for others)

So deep on so many levels.

Back in high school in grade eight, we had an assignment that included a thing about what we wanted to do with ourselves. It asked us what we wanted to be when we grow up? I think I thought a lot about it. But from memory I couldn’t think of anything else but to be a writer. I didn’t know anyone else who wanted to be like me either and growing up where I did it wasn’t considered a ‘real job’, but I continued to want to write.

Over the following decade I have seen my former school and university peers have children, enter a more professional work environment, buy a house, settle down as you will. But I didn’t follow that path. While I entered into a marriage, within months of that I had moved overseas to Scotland. It was both a big change and something I have taken in my stride.

To support myself, as I do not want to be dependant upon another person, I was able to get jobs in the hospitality industry. At 26 quiet a few people not in this industry might think it belittling or unworthy of their time to be working in such a place. But I have a job next to where I live and am able to live within my means, plus save up to be able to take holidays all over Europe 🙂 I am also able to work around the shifts I have to maintain my health and work on my books 🙂

In private my husband has been encouraging me to think about getting a higher paying job, but the industries put forward are places I would do poorly in. I would either financially destroy people without meaning to or I would endanger their health. Honesty I’m just not good in situations of high even moderate levels of stress. Not to mention that I can be extremely laid back (aka lazy) with things I don’t particularly care about. It’s just the person I am and choose to be through my actions.

I wonder what is the overall point of a high paying job anyway? I don’t spend a lot and I choose not to run with a crowd that values money or how much a person earns over other things. I’m pretty minimalist and if I’m not spending much money then what am I doing wasting hours and days of my life for the benefit of others while at the decline of my own creative ability? I didn’t do a degree in arts and creative writing to further myself just to put it aside and take out every second weekend. I did it to write. And to write often. At the end of the day I would regret limiting my writing for the sake of job that sucks up my time, energy and motivation.

I know in terms of my future people will wonder what about having a safety net? Well I have it. I live in first world country that provides for its citizens as they do for it. Overall I will be fine. I also do have savings and I’m not financially irresponsible. I have a good enough sense of ‘What if this bad thing happens’ and ‘This doesn’t seem like a good idea’ to mostly stop me from doing stupid things.

Some people will ask, ‘but do you want to do this for ever?’ And my answer is not entirely. I many work in this for years. Or I may end up somewhere else. I don’t know where life will take me. But I can guide it quite fine. I position myself in a way that means if I do get into strife then I wont be too affected. So it is not the path others do, expect or want to me to tread. It doesn’t matter. I am able to look after myself to the point where I can chase after my dream of being able to write.

But then why does it matter to other people?

A variety of reasons. They may think my actions will negatively affect them. They might not want me to become a burden to them, and I hope that I don’t. To be thought of as only someone else’s responsibility does not make me feel good about myself. Another might be that they never had the courage to diverge from the standard path themselves and it makes them feel jealous, worthless, threatened, or all of the above. It takes a special type of personality to have the balls to go after their dreams, especially if it doesn’t fit in with the status quo. And disrupting the status quo can really rub people the wrong way. That type of situation can be dangerous, people will try to put you down for having dreams, wanting to be something. Because having dreams makes you special, makes you stand out. If you come across people or situations like that run away if you can, and if you can’t find a way.

Quest for the monies, ITIN and my creative stuff.

It’s been about 2-3 weeks since my last post. I haven’t posted anything because there hasn’t been much happening until recently. These are the things that have happened.


I got a new job 🙂


It had been so long since my last job and after months of looking, unsuccessful interviews and job trials I finally snagged one. In the weeks and months before I had become to be a little depressed about it. But I submitted my resume online, got an interview hours later and I got the job that very day 🙂 I still can’t believe it. And not only that but the place is only a 10-15 minute walk from home 🙂


I’m expecting my first pay check next week. But seeing as I’ve been forced to live frugally in recent months I won’t be spending it. It’s going all into savings. Can i get a shout out for financial responsibility?


I’m almost finished my first book 🙂

It feels like it’s taken forever, but Feet or Fins is almost finished. I’ve got a few people reading over my latest version and they are going to tell me what they think about it. I’m getting excited because it’ll soon be over and I can fully move onto my other books.

But I still need to get an ITIN from the US as my first application was rejected 😦 But I know what I did wrong so I think it should be right the second time round. Trying to find the number for Australia’s treaty article number was an absolute bitch.


I went through page after page, document after document and website link after link to the point of wanting to throw a massive adult-sized tantrum in public (I was using a library computer at the time). It was when in frustration I was like ‘How ’bout I just Google it?’


I got a lot of responses, some useless because they were dealing with other countries and not mine. But then I came across a blog called Mummy K and to date I think she is the only one that lists the number – 1982. I swear this better be the answer because when I went to find the number in the actual IRS document I came up blank.  But this link list’s Australia’s and USA’s tax treaty. The article number seems to be the year that the treaty was written. I swear this better be the answer coz I don’t want to spend anymore time on this difficult quest.


I’ve got other works in progress

Some weeks ago I was stupid and split soup over my laptop’s computer. It destroyed half of my keys so I sent it to be repaired. It took about two weeks before I was told that it’d cost $400 and I was, ‘Noooo, I’ll just buy a cheap usb keyboard instead.’ And I’m using it right now 🙂

During the time between using the library computer during the day and being at home at night with no laptop (I don’t have a tv) I had all this time where I had nothing to do. The first couple of nights where tough (realising that I so sound like a drug addict, but not meaning to), I felt like I was having withdrawals. But then I began to fill my time with re-reading some of my old books that are on my bookshelf and then my mind began getting creative again. I ended up adding things to three previous stories that had been on the back burner and it made them so much better by the way. And I came up with a new young adult/teen story 🙂

This was when I realised that not having my laptop was kind of a good thing. I was forced to not go on facebook and other websites which showed me how much time I was wasting online. It made me wonder how much I could achieve if only I didn’t have the internet . . or if I could control myself better.

It made me realise that I should change my habits so that I can both fit more writing in and have my mind work more creatively.


What’s next?

Currently Feet or Fins is stationary in terms of work until I get the opinions of others back. I also need to get my ITIN, followed by creating a cover image. I have an image picked out on iStockphoto.com and I’m planning on having a go at designing the cover myself. If I find out I can’t do a good job on it then I might look for someone to do it.

I’m about half-way through my next book, which is the first of a trilogy. Once I’ve finished the first book I’m planning on writing out the rough plan for the next two. At the moment I’ve only got vague ideas of the plot/story, but the details will come to me as I’m thinking about it. I’m going to be editing them together so that when I publishing them there won’t be too much time between release dates and to make sure I have all the details worked out perfectly.


But since I got a job, I will be make my writing fit around my work. Currently I think that increasing my savings and income at the moment is more important 🙂