There are times when I doubt if I’m ever going to become a successful writer or that down the line I’ll fail and give up. That idea cuts me deep. But when I voice my concerns to Chris he tells me that you only fail as a writer when you give up. He says that me putting my work out is more than a lot of other people will ever do and it makes me feel better about myself 🙂 Thanks Lovely Chris.
At the age of 27 I think I can look back on my life with a little bit maturity and reflect on where my life has gone. Prior to graduating high school, I knew I wanted to be a writer but growing up in rural country town imprinted on me the idea of what a real job was. And it wasn’t something in the Arts.
I was not the only one who had a dream of having an artistic future. Another girl, B, got an early offer into NIDA, I think. I even remember one time in class we were talking about her future prospects. We weren’t nice about it, saying that she was never going to achieve her dreams. I wonder what my then friends said about my dreams behind my back?
B never did leave the state and lives only a few hours away in another town. Another friend of mine, L, left after graduation, but returned after a year and has never left. My mum remarked about her disappointment with L because she thought that she was smart and going to make something of herself. She was right when she said you don’t know who’s going to make it after high school.
I wonder now, however limited, what my former schoolmates think of me. Mostly they probably don’t. I was a very quiet child even then. I was once out with glandular fever for two weeks and some people didn’t even notice. Through the years I’ve seen what my former classmates have done, or not done. I have to say I was pretty consistent with what I wanted at the end of high school and what I’m doing now.
Since graduating I’ve been to four different universities, QUT, USC, UQ, UoM. Managed to get a husband and flown off with him the UK. Worked in curry house, found out that UK curries are way better than Australian curries. Self-published four stories. Come back to be disppointed with the price of everything in Australia 😦 And will be heading back off to the Netherlands by the end of the year 🙂